wandering

Psalm 105:12-15

When they were but few in number, few indeed, and strangers in it,

they wandered from nation to nation, from one kingdom to another.

He allowed no one to oppress them; for their sake he rebuked kings:

"Do not touch my anointed ones; do my prophets no harm."

Do you know who the "they" were that the Psalmist was talking about? "They" were just a couple of guys named Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. "They" just happened to be the guys God chose to bless in such a unique and special way that all of us would be the beneficiaries of the overflow of that blessing. But "they" spent their life wandering, wandering in their inheritance, wandering through the promise. Wandering.

I know about wandering. I like to wander. When I am wandering through a store it can be expensive, when I am wandering through my kitchen it can be dangerous, and when I am wandering in my mind it can be a bit scary! Wandering has a bad connotation often that I do not think is intended here. I think the wandering was an act of obedience, of sacrifice, of purpose. Is it possible to wander with purpose? Yes I think it is, and the reality of that made me feel just a whole lot better about the last several months of my life!

When I think about how "they" were described in Hebrews 11 as being commended for their faith in wandering it gave me a whole new appreciation for the discipline it takes to wander. Not the kind of aimless wandering that I do out of boredom or restlessness, but the kind of wandering that refuses to go anywhere else even when you think your obedience is taking you in circles.

I love looking at Abraham's life. The guy that God promised so much to in terms of an inheritance. A piece of land he could see and step on. In fact God went so far as to say that everywhere he put his foot would belong to him, yet the only piece of land Abraham ever had his name on was the parcel he and his wife were buried in. His wandering had boundaries, his wandering contained hope, his wandering was an act of obedience.

When I look back over summer months it is not hard to think of a word like wandering. It seems the same trash is on the floor today as it was in June, although it was picked up at least 100 times. The same items line my "to do" list, and the same number is on the scale. It would seem I would have little to show for these several months. That is until I look am my sons. My boys who have seemed to grow an inch and age several years. My guys that diligently got up at 6 each morning to drive the nearly half hour to school to lift weights and run with their football team. The guys who have learned to respond rather than react to all that life can throw, and life has quite a fastball! The guys who have celebrated the simple things that the summer has given. The joy of jumping off the roof into the pool. The fun of smores over a smoky fire in our backyard pit. The anticipation of the ridiculous shows we love to watch together on tv. And the reality that maybe the trash is still on the floor because choices were made the night before to put people about stuff and hang out rather than pick up.

I look at my sons and I know that I wandered through this summer with them. And we hit all the right places, for just long enough. We did not take vacation together, we did not do many of the things other summers have held. But in a way I think we did much more. I love the feeling of knowing that our time was well spent, rather than having something to show for our time. Souvenirs are just a little overrated, I would rather see the change in my boys as they walk down the hall each morning to start a new day just a little taller, a few more whiskers, and what seems to be a lot more ability to wander out the door and change their world.

I know I live within the promises of my life. I know there are boundaries, and I know there is purpose. And on the many days that feel as though I have passed this way before I have to know the truth that "they" knew that I am living by faith, I am looking forward to something that only together with my guys, and many others will I truly be able to arrive at a place that feels like home.